Grit

Though I do believe that intelligence is not the only factor in helping to gauge future achievements or success, I also believe that grit is only a small factor as well. In this society, we are taught to believe that if we "give up" that we have failed because everyone is supposed to "stick through it." However, one thing I have been learning, especially with my time with CLP, that this mindset can prove to be detrimental. There is nothing wrong with stepping back and realizing that, sometimes, things just are not meant to work out. Sure, it is possible to grin and bear it, but that usually leads to a loss of happiness. I admit that I can sometimes be stubborn and unyielding, especially when it comes to the work I do. However, that has lead me astray at time because I have not been able to let go when needed, which would have been good for me and others involved. For me, "grit" can be divided into "stubbornness" and "perseverance," both which have different connotations.

"Stubbornness," to me, is about refusing to accept reality or the facts, even when it is needed. We are stubborn because we do not want to lose face, be seen as failures or losers, or just want to be stubborn for no real reason. "Perseverance," on the other hand, is about sticking through the hard times because it is the best decision for you (or the individuals involved) and is not about the fear of "giving up." Growing up, I always believed that if I started something, I had to finish it no matter what. What I know realize is that the final goals are not what is most important, but rather completing these goals and going through the process in a genuine and sincere manner.

Growing Pains and Gains (Reflection)

In my time as an intern, I feel like I have grown and learned so much, due especially to the fact that I am surrounded by amazing individuals on all sides. We may come from different backgrounds and have different long-term goals, but, at the end of the day, we are all striving to learn about ourselves and our communities. Last Tuesday's meeting was difficult for everyone because it included a lot of things that needed to have been said long ago. For me personally, sometimes when I let an issue boil inside without any release, it grows into something ugly. That ugly thing is just a manifestation of my various emotions (anger, fatigue, disappointment, etc), but it is not necessarily how I truly feel. I am glad that we are now at a point where we are on similar pages once again because we have all been drifting off in a multitude of ways.

Things I have learned:
 

1) The need to be more than just work in our relationships

It is not only about the work we do that I should be concerned about, but rather sincere relationships that I have formed with my fellow interns and CLP members.

2) If you have something to say, just say it

We are all adults with our own lives, which everyone understands. Yet, to work together as a group, we need to be honest with one another. Holding back issues or problems usually cause discontent to grow over time. I need to be better about accepting my faults and my flaws.
 

3) It's okay to take a step back and re-prioritize

If it comes to the point that I am no longer happy with the work I am doing, I need to fix it,

My re-commitments:

My commitment to CLP is to step it up and become as involved as I can be for the next three months or so (~mid-August 2011) until I start graduate school. My hope is to assist with more work (beyond SU2I) and, possibly, administrative work if needed. Overall, I am committed to staying as involved with CLP as I currently am, until I am no longer living in Riverside. I am, if all goes well, also committed to going to India with the youth, fulfilling around nine months of work as a CLP intern.

Press Release Practice (GrassROUTES)

Riverside Nonprofit Fundraiser With Local Youth and Community Members For Experiential Learning Opportunity

The Child Leader Project and youth from Norte Vista High School will be coming together to raise funds for youth and young adult programs in Riverside and India, including a two-week summer study abroad program in India

RIVERSIDE, CA-- Local Riverside-based international non-profit Child Leader Project (CLP) and youth from Norte Vista High School (in the Alvord Unified School District) will be joining together for a fundraiser 5K Run/Walk/Jog-athon on March 19, 2011 at J.W. North High School. The fundraiser, titled "GrassRoutes," will bring together youth, young adults, and community members raising funds for a CLP program (Send Us to India, SU2I) that will send nine Norte Vista students to India to meet CLP partners and youth.

CLP started in 2008 by a student at the University of California, Riverside and has since grown to become an internationally recognized non-profit organization with programming in Riverside, India, and Mexico. CLP has been recognized by the Community Foundation of Riverside County, the Clinton Global Initiative University, and Riverside's City Hall.

The fundraiser will begin at 10:00 AM at North High School (located near the UCR campus) and will raise funds for CLP, UCR's Guardian Scholars Program, and Kindling Intellectual Development (KID), all of whom work in the local Riverside community. Guardian Scholars works with emancipated foster youth to help provide a network of resources to these students in the pursuit of higher education. KID (a organization also started by a UCR student) engages low-income students in elementary and middle schools in downtown Riverside with supplemental extracurricular activities. 

CLP has previously worked with Quail Valley Elementary School (Menifee Unified School District), Patriot High School (Jurupa Unified School District), and J.W. North High School (Riverside Unified School District) in engaging students with programs ranging from social justice to a pen-pal program with Indian students. The current CLP@NoVi program was recently created through the desires of CLP and Norte Vista administrators and students to create a year-long program that would include field trips (Social Justice Saturdays) and discussions revolving around issues such as interfaith, immigration, and environmental sustainability.

With the support of Norte Vista High School staff, CLP mentors, and various community members and organizations, CLP@NoVi has included an overnight retreat to Los Angeles to explore the topics of labor and immigration in the Garment District, an exploration of the issues surrounding Riverside's Chinatown, and work with Growcology (a local organization) to discuss community gardens in the Inland Empire.

GrassROUTES funds will support CLP's Send Us to India program, whose goal is to send nine Norte Vista students to India to collaborate with CLP India's young adults and youth. These students were chosen from a pool of applicants and have committed themselves towards months of trainings, ranging from social justice issues in India and Riverside, cultural differences, and ties that bind both countries together. The students from Riverside and India will also embark on a service learning project that deals with water rights in both countries, including the issues of privatization and the human right to water.

These months of trainings will culminate in a two-week program in India, where the youth will finally meet CLP Indian staff, volunteers, and youth that they have spent months working with. The trip includes visits to partner organizations, discussions surrounding social justice issues, and collaborative community projects. Once returning from India, the Norte Vista students will bring back their experiences to the community and their fellow students, sharing their stories and thoughts through various outlets, including writings and artwork.

The funds raised will help cover the plane fare expenses, travel/lodging in India, and any food expenses during the two week experience. CLP plans to hold various fundraising events with help from CLP mentors, Norte Vista students and families, and community members over the next few months in order to help finance the program.

"GrassROUTES is about bringing together the community to help support these students as they prepare for an experience of a lifetime. Not only will they be able to discuss social justice issues that they experience in their daily lives in Riverside, but they will be able to interact with their brothers and sisters in India who are going through similar experiences. It's not just about India or Riverside, but rather how we can build communities and links between the two, which CLP helps nurture."

"I am very excited about GrassROUTES. We all put hard work into this event and I'm looking forward to the day when it will all come together. I appreciate all the people who took part in making this happen. The fact that Guardian Scholars are a part of this means the world to me," says CLP GrassROUTES coordinator Serkadis Krohm.

Reflection (Going Slowly)

Ever since I can remember, I have always been worried about "falling behind" my friends and my peers. Always worried that I needed to keep pushing to go faster, I believed (and sometimes still do) that I needed to accomplish everything before everyone else did. Now, at an age where college graduation is steadily approaching, I have begun to worry about the future. I truly would love to attend graduate school this fall and have submitted an application for a program that I believe suits my needs and interest, however, I can only wait and see whether or not I will be accepted. I have been trying to think of the likely scenario that I will not get accepted this year, which in the beginning was very difficult. Not only would it be a rejection, but I would be falling behind. My peers would be going to grad school and here I would be left behind and, in many ways, I would feel like a failure. 

However, the more I thought about it and talked with my siblings and friends, the more I realized that I have been looking at it all wrong. Lots of individuals (especially in the program I am interested in) attend graduate school in later in life and they are in no way failures. Therefore, why would I consider myself a failure for taking time before pursuing grad school? In school, there was always the mentality of needing to be first and of performing better than everyone else, which made it difficult to just enjoy life. After my time in Japan, away from the stressful environment of the American education system, I have begun to realize how important it is to just enjoy this time in college. Taking the time to just breathe has shown its effects in my grades and has allowed me to form better relationships with other individuals. I think a lot of my difficulty with going slow has been due to this mental schedule of my life that I have created, such as "married at so-and-so age," "own a house at so-and-so age," and et cetera. I keep rushing towards this timeline I have constructed, without really thinking about why I am do so and what effects it has.

One aspect of CLP that I truly enjoy is how members truly enjoy taking the time to just talk and discuss about a wide variety of subjects. When we work, we work hard, but we also realize how stressful it can be always pushing forward without taking the time to just soak it all in. I think the weekly intern meetings help us all stay grounded and connected to one another, even when our personal and school lives head in different directions.

Instead of just rushing because I am fearful of being left behind, I am hoping to better enjoy life, its experiences, and the amazing people I meet. A place I enjoy being is at the airport because it is a location where you cross paths with people not only from different walks of life, but different countries. I love just sitting and watching everyone pass by as I realize how amazing it is to have these brief second relationships with these people. We may be hurrying to different places in our lives, but it is nice to take the time to actually look at people and to connect for that brief second. I am only one out of a billion plus individuals on this planet and it is a shame that I never spend the time to just look at people. Instead of rushing, maybe I should take the time to just look and observe. At the end of the day, I will still accomplish what I set out to do and will not be any less of a successful person for slowing down to enjoy life.

Communication

One thing I learned from the CLP international teleconference is how important communication is when working within an organization and with others. My biggest fault has been relying heavily on Sam and Rachel to deal with setting up dates and times with events, without ever verifying that everything has been prepared. One of the issues that came up was confusion about the teleconference and the parent night orientation, which some had believed to be the same thing. This lead to the parent night (originally scheduled for January 18) being canceled, as we had to work with the school to have the orientation on campus. For the most part, I think everyone realized how much better we need to be about communication, with one another and the people that we work with (especially at Norte Vista).

In many respects, my work within CLP has mostly involved the other interns and Sam/Rachel, meaning that I barely know the other members of CLP beyond their names and faces. A lot of this is due to the fact that I rarely see these individuals, other than at CLP events which makes it difficult to leisurely talk and hang out as we are busy. I see the CLP interns and Sam usually once a week, which means that I feel closer to them and more comfortable working with them. However, CLP is an organization whose work depends on collaboration and group efforts, meaning that I need to get better at working with everyone. This is something I have set myself to being better at, especially in the next few months as we get into the heart of SU2I training and fundraising. 

CLP at Norte Vista International Teleconference

On January 13, 2011, CLP held an international teleconference on the Norte Vista High School Campus. For the most part, I think that the event succeeded immensely and that we all learned a lot from the event.

The event was originally scheduled for January 10th, but due to some issues with the school and finding a space on campus to host our event, it was pushed back several days. For the most part, the schedule change helped us as we were better able to prepare and gave us a chance to breathe a bit.

The interns came up with this schedule, one that we thought would be the most efficient and helpful for the parents and students who showed up.

6:00 PM: We arrive at NoVi to set up and make sure everything is working well.
~ Hand out questions cards to people as they arrive
~ Pick up the cards and sort through them. Select the questions we will be asking Sam.
6:30 PM: Brief SU2I information session by Serkadis and I.
7:00 PM: Start the teleconference with Sam (with Serkadis reading the questions, Gilbert/Karla translating).
8:00 PM: Wrap-up begins.
8:30 PM: Clean up and we're finished!

Since Sam was in India during the planning, we (the intern team) did our best with planning and trying to think about any issues that would come up. We knew who could make it, what their roles were, what the plan was, and how we wanted to execute it. Sam and I Skyped the night before to ensure that there would be no problems connecting to one another, testing out the sound and video quality. Overall, we felt satisfied with our preparation and I felt that we had planned as well as possible, given the time limits.

However, nothing ever goes according to plan and that was something we truly learned that night. First, when I arrived at NoVi, I was told that my computer (a Macbook) would not work because the adapter would not work with it. Therefore, we switched to Sara's computer (that she brought as a backup in case there were problems with my computer), which did not have a webcam. This meant that we would be able to see Sam and everyone else in India, but that they would not be able to see us. We had not prepared for this possibility and, to be truthful, I started freaking out a bit. This was also augmented by the fact that there was some confusion about the purpose of teleconference. There was apparently some miscommunication about how there was a teleconference and a separate parent night (for SU2I information), which showed the lack of communication that had occurred.

Even though we had planned it all out, the technical problems became first in our minds and we abandoned the schedule as we began worrying more and more. In hindsight, I should have been better about trying to keep the event on schedule, despite any slight hiccups, as it left the youth and parents feeling as though we had no clue what we were doing. Thankfully, a parent was able to assist us in fixing the problems and we were able to start the teleconference, albeit later than we had planned.

Not surprisingly, the youth had a hard time at first asking questions, which was expected. However, after we had the youth introduce themselves to the webcam, many seemed to slowly open up. By the end, we had students who were eagerly answering question posed by the partners in India and we were forced to stopped due to time running out. It was amazing seeing how excited they all were, as it the reality of the program and SU2I became more apparent to them. These were the people that they would be meeting if they became part of SU2I. Another great aspect was being able to see how supportive the parents were, as they spoke of how glad they were that their children were involved in CLP. It felt amazing knowing that the youth and their parents believe in what we are doing, which makes all of the work truly worth it. While we were cleaning up, I was able to talk with a few of the students and they seemed excited about CLP and SU2I, especially with July looming closer and closer. Overall, the event was a success because it made everyone, including me, much more excited about the reality that we are going to India in a few months. It is going to be an amazing and difficult few months, but I feel ready for the challenge with the CLP team and the NoVi youth and families.

Five Goals/Resolutions for 2011

1) Get myself to India, which means coming up with SU2I trainings and preparation for the next six months, as well as working with the entire CLP team to accomplish everything we have set ourselves up to do.

2) Fundraise, fundraise, fundraise. Learn how to put on a successful event, how to promote it, how to get people interested in what we do, and how to send the NoVi youth to India without them worrying about financial issues.

3) Possibly complete an Upper Division Honors Project relating to my CLP internship. It would be an amazing opportunity to be able to do research that deals with my experiences with CLP, especially since I would like to work with non-profits in the future.

4) Relearn Chinese. It has been years since I have practiced or used my Mandarin, but I hope to re-familiarize myself within the next twelve months. I would truly love to be able to speak fluently someday, with the hopes of traveling around China in a few years.

5) Think about the future. As in, if I do not go to graduate school, what do I want to do? Where do I see myself in after graduation?

(Overdue from an intern meeting earlier in the month.)